Cindy Ball, Principal
Smart Ass
During the past few weeks I’ve had a bit of a revelation; aging is a lot like parenting. I know all you young gals out there are thinking what the heck is she talking about? I’m 42 (not exactly old given 40 is the new 30 – right!) and my oldest daughter (I have three in total) is 9 years old. I’ve been parenting and, as luck would have it, aging for 10 years (including my pregnancy of course). I look back at the pictures when I was pregnant with # 1 and I looked so YOUNG. My aging definitely kicked into high gear after babies started popping out!
So back to my revelation. When you first become a parent you REALLY believe your parenting is shaping your child and that they’re perfectly behaved because of all your wonderful parenting. It’s the old nurture vs. nature argument. If you were blessed with an easy going first child you think you’re God’s gift to parenting. Then whamo, # 2 or 3 arrives, you do the same things and the outcome is different! It’s a bit like when you’re young with perfect, wrinkle free skin. You think it’s something you’re doing and then whamo, those wrinkles start to roll in and then one day you look down and instead of your hands typing on your laptop – your mother’s hands are tapping away!
I’m coming to believe that much of how we age and how our kids behave hinges on our genes. Of course, there are some basics on the aging side; don’t fry yourself in the sun, wear sunscreen, don’t smoke – we all know them. And on the parenting side; talk to your kids, feed them well, read to them, plug those nasty outlets with little white plastic things so the kids don’t fry themselves! Yes, there are things we can do as parents and as aging women to help things turn out okay BUT don’t be too hard on yourself sometimes it’s just the way it is! Accept it - temper tantrum throwing children, laugh lines, wrinkly hands – all of it.
The main reason I think parenting is like aging is because you should NEVER judge a parent with children older than yours or a woman with skin older than yours – NEVER! Parents-to-be need to learn this in pre-natal class. It’s as important as learning when to push. I remember when #1 was still a blob of a baby visiting with friends who had older children and thinking “I will never let my children eat French Fries, run around by themselves, stay up late” you fill in your own list of “nevers”. Fast forward a few years and my girls are doing all this and much worse. The same goes for being young and fresh faced. Please don’t criticize those aging blazers ahead of you. If they decide that microdermabrasion, lasers or injections is the path they need to follow, so be it. Please don’t judge them until you’ve walked a mile in their wrinkles!
So there you have it, my thoughts on parenting and aging – good luck on both fronts!
Cindy Ball and her business partner Alix Cameron own Smart Ass Lingerie. Between them they have five children and their fair share of wrinkles. Check out their fabulous lingerie at http://www.smartassgals.com/ .
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